Managing Carer Stress: When to Ask for Help and How
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    Managing Carer Stress: When to Ask for Help and How

    Jean Du, BPharm
    July 25, 2025
    7 min read
    "Because being strong doesn't mean doing it all alone."

    Caring for someone you love — whether it's your parent, partner, child, or friend — is one of the most generous things you can do. It's also one of the most exhausting.

    Carer stress builds slowly: in the quiet between appointments, in the skipped meals, in the long nights of worry, and in the voice that whispers, "I should be able to handle this."

    At Nurtura, we know that asking for help isn't a weakness. It's a survival skill. So here's how to spot the signs that it's time — and how to actually ask.

    First, the Signs You're Carrying Too Much

    You might need support if you're noticing:

    Constant exhaustion, even after rest
    Trouble focusing or remembering things
    Feeling easily overwhelmed, tearful, or irritable
    Withdrawing from people or hobbies
    Trouble sleeping or changes in appetite
    Feeling like you're on edge all the time
    Thoughts like: "I can't keep this up" or "No one understands."

    When to Ask for Help

    The answer? Before you break.

    You don't need to hit a crisis point to justify reaching out.

    A good rule of thumb:

    If you're regularly saying "I've got it" but secretly thinking "I can't do this anymore" — it's time.

    Who Can You Ask?

    Support doesn't always look like professional care. Start with:

    Family & Friends

    Be specific: "Can you take Mum to her appointment Tuesday?" works better than "Let me know if you can help."

    Community Resources

    Local councils, carers' organisations, and churches often offer free respite, transport, or meal services.

    If you're in the UK, check Carers UK, Age UK, or your GP for referrals.

    Healthcare Professionals

    Ask the GP, nurse, or social worker: "What support is available for me as a carer?"

    You may be eligible for a carer's assessment, financial support, or home visits.

    Digital Tools (like Nurtura!)

    Let tech help lighten the mental load. Nurtura offers emotional check-ins, task sharing, and gentle nudges — all via WhatsApp — so the weight doesn't fall on just one person.

    How to Ask for Help (Even if It Feels Awkward)

    Try saying:

    1

    "I'm really tired and could use some backup. Could you help with ___?"

    2

    "I've been doing this solo for a while, and it's catching up with me."

    3

    "I'm not okay, and I need some space to catch my breath."

    You don't have to be falling apart to deserve support. You just have to be human.

    What If You've Waited Too Long?

    If you're already in burnout, take this seriously. You're not failing — you're overdue for care.

    Start by:

    1

    Telling someone today. Just one person.

    2

    Booking a GP appointment (for yourself).

    3

    Taking one thing off your plate — and not picking it back up.

    You can't care for someone else if you disappear in the process.

    Nurtura Is Here to Help

    We built Nurtura because we've been there — waking up at 3am with the weight of everything, wishing someone would just check in.

    Nurtura helps families coordinate care, check on each other, and share the load — all without needing another app or spreadsheet.

    👉 Join the waitlist or follow us on Instagram for tools, reminders, and gentle support for carers like you.

    About the Author

    Jean Du is the Strategic Delivery & Partnerships Lead at Nurtura.

    Jean is a Chinese-Australian pharmacist, strategist, connector, systems thinker, and carer who previously worked at Australia's Department of Health, Disability and Ageing.

    Based in London, she knows what it's like to provide care from far away. At Nurtura, she leads delivery and partnerships— turning Nurtura's vision into something that actually works for families, for partners, and for the long haul. She sits at the crossroads of product, operations, and storytelling.

    Ready to start your care journey with support?

    Join our waitlist to be the first to know when Nurtura launches.

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